Top 10 Hilarious "Get Hard" Quotes from Will Ferrell

Will Ferrell is known for his comedic talent and ability to make people laugh. One of his most hilarious movies is “Get Hard,” where he plays the character James King, a wealthy businessman who is convicted of fraud and sentenced to prison. Throughout the movie, Ferrell delivers some truly funny and memorable lines that are sure to have you in stitches. Below, we’ve compiled a list of the top 10 hilarious “Get Hard” quotes from Will Ferrell.

1. “I am not a gangbanger. In fact, I think gangs are stupid. I mean, how do you have a meeting with all those different bandanas?” – James King

2. “If I’m going to survive prison, I need to learn how to be the biggest, baddest, motherf**ker in this joint. So give me your best convict face.” – James King

3. “That’s some impressive taint push-ups.” – Darnell Lewis (played by Kevin Hart)

4. “You don’t know me. I’m not some privileged white guy who just floats through life on a river of moo-la.” – James King

5. “I’m gonna shank and shiv every last one of those motherf**kers. Or maybe I’ll just sue them for cruel and unusual punishment.” – James King

6. “When life gives you lemons, you sell some of your grandma’s jewelry and go clubbin’.” – James King

7. “I guess you could say I’m a convict in-training. Like a puppy, but without all the cute and cuddly parts.” – James King

8. “I can protect you! Just teach me the ways of the street. Show me how to be hard.” – James King

9. “I used to get beat up all the time when I was a kid. So I’m really good at running away.” – James King

10. “If I’ve learned anything from movies, it’s that when you’re in prison, you absolutely do not want to drop the soap. So maybe invest in some soap-on-a-rope.” – James King

These quotes from Will Ferrell in “Get Hard” are just a taste of the hilarity that ensues in this comedy. If you’re in need of a good laugh, be sure to check out this film.

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The Funniest Quotes from “Get Hard” Movie

1. “I am not going to prison for you or for anyone. You know what I mean? Unless it’s a really, really bad person. Or it’s a white-collar prison, then maybe. But I’m not doing well with the whole ‘Don’t drop the soap’ concept. So I’m out.” – James King

2. “There are a lot of people in this prison who think I run things. That’s because I do. I collect bets, I loan out money, I sell contraband. I guess I’m what you would call a power broker.” – Darnell Lewis

3. “Oh no, I didn’t realize we were doing impressions. This is my impression of a man who is scared of prison. Help me! Help me, I don’t want to go to prison!” – James King

4. “You think I’m not hood? You think I’m not gangsta? You think I’m not street? I’m the most gangsta person here! I got three strikes, man. Three strikes! I’m out!” – Darnell Lewis

5. “I can tell by the way you dress that you’re gonna be my bitch.” – Russell

6. “You think you’re a tough guy? I once had a Korean nanny that was tougher than you. She used to put me in a headlock just to wake me up in the morning.” – James King

7. “Let’s say we do this. I’m gonna need three things: a weapon, a shiv, and some mace. Also, if we could get some kind of implant, like a microchip that will explode if I ever try to leave the state, that would be awesome.” – Darnell Lewis

8. “You may have three black friends, but two of them are Andre, who plays tennis, and Joseph, who owns a boat.” – James King

9. “You know how I know you’re rich? Because you got three computer monitors.” – Darnell Lewis

10. “You want to survive in prison? Step one, stop saying you don’t want to be in prison.” – Darnell Lewis

Will Ferrell’s Hilarious One-Liners in “Get Hard”

Will Ferrell is known for his comedic genius, and his role in “Get Hard” is no exception. Here are some of the funniest one-liners delivered by Ferrell in this uproarious film:

“I guess in prison, you’re somebody’s bitch, or you’re somebody’s bitch. That kinda makes you somebody’s bitch, don’t it?”
“Hey, hey, everybody’s gangsta until the handcuffs come on.”
“Prison rape is way down the list of things that I’m worried about happening to me.”
“Prison is absolutely nothing like it is on TV. You will not be taken care of. Just take my word for it, 90% of your bigger, stronger cellmates, are going to want to cuddle.”
“I’m not really the outdoorsy type. I’m more of an indoor sy type.”
“You know I could buy you; I could buy and sell you!”
“You’ve been living in this bubble your whole life, it’s time for you to discover who you really are.”
“Was I just racially profiled? You’re black, and I’m about to pay you $30,000 to prepare me for prison!”
“If anyone tries to attack you, we have a secret whistle. Just blow it, and remember the most important thing, the sound of the whistle brings its own set of problems.”
“You know what kind of names prisoners call guys like us? Fresh meat! That’s right, we’re like lettuce, and they’re starving rabbits.”

These one-liners are just a taste of the hilarity that ensues in “Get Hard.” Will Ferrell’s comedic timing and delivery make this film a must-watch for any fan of his work.

Laugh Out Loud with These “Get Hard” Quotes

If you’re in need of a good laugh, look no further than the hilarious quotes from Will Ferrell in the movie “Get Hard”. This comedy is filled with ridiculous and outrageous lines that are guaranteed to have you rolling on the floor. Here are some of the best quotes from the film:

“I’m going to prison for forty-five years. I got to learn how to fight.”

This quote perfectly captures the absurdity of the film as Ferrell’s character, James, freaks out about his impending prison sentence.
“I got to prepare myself for this… I’m going to go hard.”

James’s determination to toughen up before going to prison leads to hilarious and cringe-worthy training sequences.
“I apologize for my terrible performance. I will try much harder next time.”

This quote showcases Ferrell’s impeccable comedic timing as James tries to impress his trainer with his fighting skills.
“I don’t want to just survive. I want to thrive!”

James’s over-the-top optimism and ambition in prison is both hilarious and endearing.
“We can’t be acting like a couple of pro-choice liberals!”

This politically incorrect quote highlights the film’s satirical take on cultural and social issues.
“What’s the nickname for the knuckle?”

Ferrell’s delivery of this line is priceless as James tries to uncover the secrets of surviving in prison.
“I need to go to the hole. I need a white friend, fast!”

This quote showcases Ferrell’s talent for delivering outrageous and politically incorrect lines with perfect comedic timing.
“You can’t be a real thug with all them feelings.”

This quote humorously explores the juxtaposition of toughness and vulnerability in James’s character.
“I’m too righteous to get high!”

James’s absurd and misguided attempt at avoiding drug use in prison provides a great comedic moment.
“I will never be able to fit in with the black inmates. They’ve got the wrong idea about me!”

This quote emphasizes James’s hilarious misconceptions and awkwardness in a predominantly black prison.

These quotes are just a taste of the hilarity that awaits you in “Get Hard”. If you’re in need of a good laugh, this movie is a must-watch.

Top 10 Memorable Lines from “Get Hard”

“I’m built for gangsta shit. You built for cubicle shit”
“You better get hard, homie!”
“You got nothing on me. You act like a super-duper hardo, but you’re a softie at heart.”
“I’m getting in the car, bitch!”
“I’m not going to prison, I’m too fucking rich!”
“You’re about to catch a dick, son”
“I hit hard like Newton’s third law, motherfucker!”
“This is like some slavery shit!”
“I get the idea that $40,000 is a lot of money to you. It’s not to me.”
“I’ll eat your dick, Holmes!”

Will Ferrell’s Best Moments in “Get Hard”

Will Ferrell delivers a hilarious performance in the comedy film “Get Hard,” showcasing his comedic timing and improvisational skills. Here are some of his best moments from the movie:

Prison Roleplay: Ferrell’s character, James King, awkwardly engages in a prison roleplay with Darnell (played by Kevin Hart), hilariously attempting to prepare himself for life behind bars.
Teaching the Nod: In an attempt to fit in with his future cellmates, James tries to teach Darnell how to do the “prison nod,” resulting in a hilarious exchange of awkward head movements.
Prepping for a Fight: James undergoes an intense training montage to prepare for a potential prison fight, complete with comically exaggerated boxing moves and questionable workout techniques.
Prison Gang Hierarchy: James hilariously outlines the complex hierarchy of prison gangs, using a makeshift table and props to explain the different levels of power and respect.
Paranoid Conspiracy Theories: James, fueled by his fear of prison life, goes on a hilarious rant about conspiracy theories involving the government, aliens, and various absurd scenarios.
Playing “Duck Duck Goose”: In an attempt to teach James self-defense, Darnell hilariously turns it into a game of “Duck Duck Goose,” resulting in a funny and unexpected climactic chase.
Prison Slang: James struggles to memorize and understand various prison slang terms, leading to comical misinterpretations and misunderstandings during his interactions with other characters.
Mixing Up Rap Songs: During a car ride, James hilariously mixes up popular rap songs, attempting to rap along but continuously getting the lyrics wrong, much to Darnell’s amusement.
Prison Gangsta Dance: James, in an attempt to imitate a tough prison gangster, hilariously dances in an exaggerated and over-the-top manner, much to the amusement of his friends.
Character Shift: Towards the end of the movie, James undergoes a surprising character shift, revealing a hidden talent for negotiation and business skills, which leads to a funny and unexpected turn of events.

These moments highlight Will Ferrell’s comedic genius and his ability to bring laughter to any film he stars in, making “Get Hard” a hilarious and memorable comedy.

“Get Hard” Movie: Funniest Quotes Ranked

Darnell: “You don’t know sh*t about the streets! You just a scared little rich bitch!”
James: “This is not as bad as it seems. We just need to think of a plan. What would you do if you were locked up?”
Darnell: “You mean, other than go to the police and clear my name because I’m an innocent hardworking man who never did anything wrong?”
James: “You ever heard of Hannibal Lecter? He ate a guy’s face off. He’s a voracious eater.”
Darnell: “You think you’re dangerous? I’m the one who’s risking my life giving this tall-ass white boy a crash course in incarceration!”
James: “If you don’t help me, I’m going to get killed in jail!”
Darnell: “You’re going to get killed because you’re soft. You’re going to get killed because you’re soft as baby sh*t.”
James: “First rule in prison: Get a cellmate.”
Darnell: “I’m not going to be your prison bitch!”
James: “What the hell are you doing? You just threw a knife at my head!”

Hilarious Dialogues from “Get Hard” You Can’t Miss

Will Ferrell is well-known for his comedic performances, and “Get Hard” is no exception. In this movie, Ferrell delivers some truly hilarious lines that are sure to make you laugh out loud. Here are some of the funniest dialogues from “Get Hard” that you can’t miss:

James King: “If I ever find myself in prison, I would just walk up to the biggest guy in the yard and punch him in the face as hard as I can.”
Darnell Lewis: “You would die.”
James King: “That’s just prison 101, man. Don’t let anyone think you’re weak.”
James King: “Step 1: We get you to toughen up.”
Darnell Lewis: “How do we do that?”
James King: “By getting a job. You know, to get hard, you have to show them that you’re hard.”
Darnell Lewis: “That’s not how that works.”
James King: “Step 2: We make you socially acceptable. You can’t just say the N-word.”
Darnell Lewis: “I wouldn’t say the N-word.”
James King: “What about all those times you said it during the car ride over here?”

These dialogues are just a taste of the hilarious moments you’ll find in “Get Hard”. Whether you’re a fan of Will Ferrell or just love a good comedy, this movie is definitely worth a watch.

The Most Comical Lines in Will Ferrell’s “Get Hard”

In the comedy film “Get Hard,” Will Ferrell delivers hilarious lines that keep audiences laughing throughout the movie. Here are the top 10 comical lines from the film:

“You’ve never been to prison, unless prison is some kind of awesome country club!”

This line perfectly captures the naivety of the character played by Will Ferrell, who believes prison is not as bad as it seems.

“I don’t think I could survive in prison. I’m not very rapey.”

Ferrell’s character, James King, displays his cluelessness about prison life with this hilarious statement.

“I need you to toughen me up. I’m getting married in 30 days, and I’m gonna be brutally honest here… I’m a big softie!”

This comical line emphasizes the urgency of James’ need to prepare for prison and showcases Ferrell’s talent for comedic timing.

“I’m not joining a gang! That’s racist! I’ll go it alone.”

James’ reaction to the suggestion of joining a gang in prison demonstrates Ferrell’s ability to find humor in awkward situations.

“There is nothing funny about penises. They’re weird-looking, they smell bad, and they don’t belong in pants.”

Ferrell’s character’s hilarious opinion on penises adds a comedic element to the film.

“You know what’s not funny? The fact that every day, thousands of innocent men are wrongly accused and put behind bars. That’s not funny. At least, not to them.”

This line pokes fun at James’ ignorance and lack of understanding of the reality of prison life.

“Monopoly is just a game. You’re talking about real money!”

In this scene, James fails to grasp the concept of money laundering, leading to this comical statement.

“What do I have to lose? Other than my virginity, my life, and my livelihood?”

Will Ferrell’s delivery of this line perfectly captures his character’s sense of impending doom.

“I’m not anyone’s bitch. You can’t put a price on that!”

James’ resistance to becoming someone’s prison “bitch” showcases Ferrell’s ability to find humor in uncomfortable situations.

“What are you doing?” “I’m getting hard. Is that not what you wanted?”

This exchange between James and his trainer shows Ferrell’s talent for delivering unexpected and hilarious lines at the perfect moment.

Question and answer:

What is the funniest line in “Get Hard”?

While humor is subjective and different people may find different lines funnier, one of the hilarious lines in “Get Hard” is: “You look like Cookie from ‘Empire’!” This line is delivered by Will Ferrell’s character to Kevin Hart’s character during a scene in the movie.

Who says the line, “Why are you 50 shades of Grey?” in “Get Hard”?

This line is said by Kevin Hart’s character to Will Ferrell’s character in the movie “Get Hard”. It is a funny line that references the popular book and movie series “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

Is “Get Hard” a comedy movie?

Yes, “Get Hard” is a comedy movie. It is a raunchy comedy that stars Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart. The movie follows the story of a wealthy businessman who is sentenced to prison and enlists the help of a car washer to prepare him for life behind bars.

What is the premise of the movie “Get Hard”?

The movie “Get Hard” follows the story of a wealthy businessman named James King, played by Will Ferrell, who is sentenced to prison for fraud. In order to prepare himself for life behind bars, he enlists the help of Darnell Lewis, played by Kevin Hart, who he assumes has experience in prison due to his race. The movie is a comedy that revolves around their interactions and attempts to get James ready for prison.

Why is “Get Hard” considered a funny movie?

“Get Hard” is considered a funny movie because it features the comedic talents of actors like Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart. The movie includes humorous situations, witty dialogue, and exaggerated comedic performances that aim to make the audience laugh. The movie also explores comedic themes such as stereotypes, social class differences, and misunderstandings, which add to its comedic appeal.

Best “Get Hard” Quotes by Will Ferrell